Generations

Generations
an essay by Cliff Raymond

Communicating values between generations has always been difficult, since it is the nature of youth to question the assumptions and values of the previous generation. By and large, this "generation gap" is a healthy phenomena: worthy values tend to survive and are reinforced by the testing process, while faulty assumptions are replaced by new ideas that will be tested by the next generation.

But if we fail to communicate those ideas that we believe are important, if we do not pass on the lessons that our parents were taught by their parents, then we spawn a generation with no compass, doomed to repeat the mistakes of history that were not effectively communicated. In short, we are left with a nation in decline, a society in chaos -- a television-addicted nation where the generation "gap" has become a gulf of illegitimacy and broken marriages.

Unintended consequences

In America, the "unintended consequence" seems to have replaced the Constitution as the law of the land. Before the stigma of divorce was relaxed during the 60's, the divorce rate averaged 25% to 30%. By 1990, the "glue" of stigma was so diluted that half of all marriages foundered, often at the first sign of rough weather. The same people who hold a "no pain, no gain" attitude about jogging or aerobics will throw in the towel at the first hint of marital problems.

The original idea, of course, was that disintegrating bad marriages would allow us to find fulfillment with more compatible partners. Children were widely believed to be resilient enough that they could adapt, and even profit, from the separation of unhappy partners. In many cases, no doubt, that was true -- particularly in abusive situations. Most divorces, however, are the result of "incompatibilities" rather than violence, and the single-parent household is now widely acknowledged to be one of the biggest contributors to our welfare and crime problems.

Another stigma that has been relaxed is the one that used to shame "loose" women, irresponsible boys, and bastard children. Girls with bad reputations have always been popular with young men -- at least until they got pregnant. Not surprisingly, girls that "go all the way" are still in great demand by boys influenced more by hormones than an overriding concern for society.

Life is terribly unfair in that an unmarried mother has always suffered more than the father. This injustice has pervaded just about all societies throughout recorded history.

In today's America, though, loose girls are no longer treated with contempt. As a result, even more girls are ready and willing to join in the fun. After all, it's not "fair" that a girl should be shunned for doing something that a boy is expected to do (at least by other boys). Still, it's amazing how—in the name of sexual freedom—these young women so casually discard the incredible power they hold over men.

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